Descriptive essay paragraph 2. I'm sitting on my bed which makes me feel cozy: it's covered I'm lots of fluffy

pillows and blankets. My favorite blanket is fuzzy and has bright colors on it. My carpet is tan colored and has some sort of swirl design on it. To the left of my bed there is a hope chest that my mom bought me and i plan on passing it down to my daughter, it is wooden and has a cushin flower top on it. Next to that there is a video rack made of brass and full of videos. Then there is a stereo cabinet in the corner of that all and nedt to my bed which holds my telephone, alarm clock, lamp, and a vanilla candle which i like to burn when i have had a stressfull day. On the other side of my bed there are two dressers next to each other. the one on the left holds the dve player and the dresser on the right holds the tv. My closet is next to the dresser on the right. It has no doors on it and its full of hanging cloths.n the last wall of my room there is a door to the bathroom.Then there is a heater vent on the floor next to the door.And then a dresser where i keep my kids cloths.

Descriptive essay paragraph 2. I'm sitting on my bed which makes me feel cozy: it's covered I'm lots of fluffy
I answered your other question as well. I think it would help us to help you if you provided the prompt. Are you asked to give a full description of what your room looks like? Or is this a creative writing assignment about your bedroom?





What you've provided is a list of what's in your room, which is thorough, yes, but leaves you with very little room to be creative. This is okay if you're simply supposed to give a minorly descriptive glaze-over of what you own.





The easiest way to describe things in a room is to describe them each in turn as you move through it. If you start on your bed, talk about what you're touching: the blanket, the pillow. Don't talk about the carpet yet. If you say you stand up, then it's appropriate to talk about the carpet. Maybe you stub your toe on the hope chest, then describe it. Then your eyes can scan one side of the room, and you make a short list of what you see.





It's good you're being thorough, but perhaps you want something that's also a bit more interesting to read. I'm not trying to knock you down; I'm just trying to help.
Reply:helllo


dats a list


make it more expressive naaa
Reply:what do you want me to do?
Reply:Omg that is not a descriptive essay! That's a list!





You need wayyyy more description and stop using so many full stops. Your sentences need to flow more.





Think outside the box. For instance - your video rack. Don't call it that. Say: To the left is my rack of dreams, from where I gain inspiration and a broader sense of what it means to live. My personal favourite, [insert name] has taught me how it is truly a gift to be able to read. Which takes me onto my bookcase, my chest of ... "





Etc.





And: "I look to my carpet where I often lie and gaze at my pale ceiling. I was never pleased with the tan colour, I thought it was too dull for my liking. My ceiling though. I love it. I think of it as a blank slate and I paint imaginary pictures on it when I am feeling low"





It makes for a more interesting read. Also at the moment your "essay" doesn't flow very well. Use more descriptive words.





Hope that helps =]



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